A Sad Day

Online war boosters mourned the non-fatal crash of Air France Flight 358, which skidded off a runway at Lester B. Pearson International Airport in Toronto on Tuesday. That all 309 people aboard survived shook them deeply.

"I was all ready to write how 8/2 would now join 9/11, 3/11, 7/7 and 7/21 as infamous dates in our war for freedom," muttered Michael J. Totten. "I was hoping that al-Qaeda was behind it, or maybe Hamas, which would be cool, and that there would be a lot of dead bodies. But it looks like it was the weather. Damn."

"When I first heard about the crash, I began writing about how the French were now truly our comrades in the fight against Islamofascism," said Roger L. Simon. "But since no terrorism was involved, I'm glad it happened. The French are gutless. Serves them right."

James Lileks sighed, "As you know, I'm rather quick with the Franco-phobe bon mot. There's probably no other writer alive who gets so much negative use out of 'baguette' and 'Brie.' Yesterday, I was prepared to put all that aside. I had a nifty DeGaulle reference at hand, one of my better sentences of late, but now there's no point. So instead, I'm writing about buying a hammer at Home Depot."

When reached by cell phone late Tuesday, Christopher Hitchens had only this to say: "Mordez mon dick, my dear fellow."